I Like My Coffee Like I Like My Women
by Grey L. Bloom
Summary: Sappy oneshot for the hell of it. Just so everybody knows, polxmal is my favoritest noncanon pairing EVAR.


A/N: Just a little bit of sappy cuteness before I start chapter 8 of 'Viri Sunt Viri'. Carlin and Kareem were demanding some alone time together. (OMG! Sex? Haha no.) 

I Like My Coffee Like I Like My Women

Maladicta woke up suddenly and unexpectedly moments after she dropped off to sleep, her eyes snapping open in the sudden light.

"Oh gods," she groaned, rolling over and huddling her face in the crook of her arm.

Someone prodded her shoulder, and she groaned again. "Get up, Mal," came the familiar voice from behind her, and Maladicta felt the bed shake. "You're sleeping the day away."

"'m a v'mp'r," she grumbled back, squishing her face deeper into the pillow. "V'mp'rs d'nt g't up 'nna morning."

"I'll confiscate your coffee beans."

Maladicta sprang out of the sheets, flailing as she hit the floor. "I'm up! I'm up! Rise and shine! Look! Look at how awake I am! Wow! What a great morning! Boy howdy am I up! Give me coffee!"

Polly laughed raucously and flopped over the bed to twinkle at the other girl. "You crazy woman," she said.

Maladicta grimaced, rubbing her neck and flashing a mock-hateful look at Polly. "Look who's talking," she grumbled.

Polly laughed again and bounced up off the bed, snatching Maladicta up by the wrist and dragging her along. "Come on, come on," she said happily. "Today we're going down to visit Paul and Shufti!"

"Ouch! Dammit, Pol... did you get into my coffee beans!"

"I'm just excited!"

"Your brain," Maladicta accused jerkily as Polly dragged her, bounding, down the stairs, "is frothing. I can see it from here. You've gone plum crazy. Daft. Completely bonkers."

And suddenly they had come to a stop on the landing, Polly holding Maladicta's wrist between their close, heaving chests, looking at each other. Polly's face was flushed and smiling, her eyes brighter than Maladicta had seen them for a long time, her ginger hair flying wild, her breath coming fast and sharp.

Something went '_thrum_' in Maladicta's veins, and her face went hot as she started to, very slowly, lean forward... before she caught herself and jolted back.

Polly smiled gently, and tugged the vampire's wrist. "Almost fall asleep again there?" she asked, and Maladicta flushed. "I didn't realize you were so tired. Here, we'll get you some coffee, and you can sleep on the wagon. What do you say?"

The lump in her stomach made it hard for her to speak. "Sure," she croaked. "Sounds great. Really... great."

Something in her voice made Polly change her expression into one of concern. "Mal? Are you all right?"

Maladicta's vision distorted. "I really..." she began, whispering throatily, and stopped to lick her suddenly dry lips. "I really _really_ want to bite your neck."

Polly's hand flew to her throat, and she took a step back. "Let's get you that coffee," she squeaked.

Maladicta sat on the stairs, collapsing onto it as though she'd lost control over her legs. "I don't think coffee will help, Pol," she said, and she set her forehead down on her knees as tears forced themselves out of the corners of her eyes. "It's not the..." She stopped and stared at her knees close-up, trying to figure out what she wanted to say. "I think you should go without me today. I think I just need some... some sleep. And a lot of coffee."

Polly knelt next to her friend and put a careful hand on her arm. "Mal," she said quietly, "I don't think you're all right. I can stay here with you if-"

"No!" Maladicta jolted up, eyes wide. "No. You should go. It's... best for me to stay here. Just for today. I'll go next time. Promise."

Polly stared at Maladicta, unflinching. "You're not telling me something," she said, and put her face close to the vampire's so that their noses were almost touching.

"Oh gods," Maladicta whispered for the second time that day, looking into the eyes of her best friend. And then she gave up, taking Polly's face gently in her hands and kissing her.

At first Polly was too shocked to respond, but after a moment she put her arms around the vampire's shoulders and opened her mouth slightly, returning the kiss with as much fervor as it had been so unexpectedly given.

They stayed like this for seconds or years, neither of them were sure which, until finally they broke apart for air. They caught their breath there on the stairs, lying side by side with the wooden steps digging into their backs, staring at the high whitewashed ceiling for a long time. Finally Maladicta got up the courage to turn towards Polly.

"We're ridiculous," she murmured. "We're soldiers. We've fought and killed and survived Strappi. And here we are... scared to death."

Polly smiled beatifically up at the ceiling for a moment before turning her face toward Maladicta. "I think," she said quietly, "that Paul and Shufti won't mind if we're a little late."

The two girls, women, soldiers... they jumped up and, laughing, chased each other back up the stairs.

_fin._


End file.
